Sex Dating & Mating Small Group Questions (Oct 29/30)

Guidelines for your discussions
1. Confidentiality: Whatever we share in the group stays in the group.
2. I statements: Speak about yourself; don’t share about someone else’s story.
3. Respect: Share your opinions and respect other people’s opinions.
4. Time: Show up on time or let someone know if you are running late.
5. Participate: Be willing to participate in the group discussion.
6. Mindfulness: Allow other people to speak; don’t dominate the time.
7. Fixing: Don’t try to fix someone; allow people their process.
8. Sharing: Be as honest as you feel capable of being about the topic.
9. Weekend: Try to come on the weekend so you have a good idea of the topic.
10. Fun: Enjoy the people in your group and enjoy the journey God has you on concerning the topic.

Look Back (Questions that make you reflect back on your week)

• What was one high you had this weekend?
• What kind of marriage did your parents have growing up?(Ideal, Spasmodic, Platonic, Chaotic, Despotic, Realistic, Great)

Look Out (Questions that make you look out and discuss how the world sees the topic)

• Tim said that marriages either get better or they start to fall back. Do you agree or disagree? Why?
• Why do you think more than half of marriages end up in divorce?

Look Up (Questions that make you look at God’s perspective on the topic)

• What’s one negative thing you saw growing up in your parent’s marriage that you have seen in your own marriage or your relationships?
• What’s one positive thing you saw growing up in your parent’s marriage that you have seen in your own marriage or your relationships?

Look In (Questions that make you look in and apply the scriptures into your life)

Tim said feelings follow actions Philippians 2:2,4
• Tim mentioned that any relationship needs Attention, Affirmation, Affection, Adventure, Accordance, if you are married which do you feel like you need?
• What do you need to do in order to bring spiritual unity in your marriage?
• Prayer Requests

Lifelines Celebration Dinner

Purpose: To honor, encourage and celebrate folks in recovery in our community.


Date: December 16th Dinner Service starts at 6:30pm. Program starts at 7pm.

Needs: Turkeys, side dishes and desserts, plates, utensils, beverages (coffee, water?), facilities: set up/take down, food servers, gift

If you can help out contact Randy Moraitis at rmoraitis@thecrossing.com

Series: Sex: Dating and Mating Small Group Questions (October 22/23)

Look Back (Questions that make you reflect back on your week)

• Where has God been working in your life lately?

Look Out (Questions that make you look out and discuss how the world sees the topic)

• Why do you think people conceal sin? “He who conceals his sins never, ever prospers…” Proverbs 28:13a

Look Up (Questions that make you look at God’s perspective on the topic)

“Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.” James 1:14-15

First stage: Strip the gears (Tim mentioned there are ‘gears’ that move us into sexual immorality

• First gear is the “talking” gear.
• Second gear is the “embracing” gear.
• Third gear is the “caressing” gear.
• Fourth gear is the “stimulating” gear.

Second stage: Lose control and the potential crash
“…not to awaken love until the time is right.” Song of Solomon 2:7
“The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing…husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting.” Ephesians 5:23, 25

• In the past when have you found yourself losing control?

Look In(Questions that make you look in and apply the scriptures into your life) Third stage: Sexual confusion
Tim mentioned that women want living together to lead to marriage and men just want sex

• Do agree with the above statement that Tim made this weekend?

• What struck you about this illustration that Tim gave this weekend about a peanut butter sandwich and a kite?

Tim mentioned that sex was soul-ish

• How do you think sex affects your soul?

Chaplain Training

We are very excited to announce that we are starting a Chaplain Ministry at The Crossing! This is a program where we will have volunteers trained and ready to do visitations to people in hospitals, hospices, homes, treatment centers, and more.


To launch this program we have an award winning Board Certified Chaplain who will conduct a training on Wednesday November 9th from 6:00-8:00pm here at The Crossing.

I am writing to you because I would like to invite you to attend this very valuable one-time training where you will learn the skills needed to encourage and pray for someone going through a difficult situation.

If you would like to attend this training, please RSVP to Randy Moraitis at rmoraitis@thecrossing.com
Sincerely,

Grow Ministries

December 10th Spiritual Retreat for Grow Ministry

We have created a day to prepare to prepare you for the 2012 season of Spiritual Growth!

Here are just a few details:

• Time: December 10th, Saturday from 9am-3pm
• Location: O’neil Park http://www.ocparks.com/oneillpark/ . It takes about 30-35 minutes from Costa Mesa to get to O'neil Park.
• Cost: $10. ($5 for parking, pay that when yo arrive at gate and $5 for the material, pay that when you get in the room)
• What about food? Bring drinks, snacks and your lunch. In order to keep the cost down we will NOT be providing food so make sure you bring something from home.

• Bring: Your lunch and drinks for the day, lawn chair, Bible, journal,pen. If you have the book 'The Life You've Always Wanted' by John Ortberg make sure to bring it.

- Weather: Check the weather to see if you need to bring a jacket, you will be spending time outside in the beauty of nature.

Special Night @ Detken's

Come ALL Mentors, Mentees and Group Leaders on
November 19th 7-8:30pm and enjoy a night of Celebrating what God has done this past year.

We will share worship together, pray together and share communion together as we begin this Thanksgiving season!

This is a special time designed for you as someone leading or being mentored in the Grow Ministries. Come join us! RSVP at pdetken@thecrossing.com

Small Group Questions for Sex Series (Week Oct 17-23)

Lean In


• How long have you been attending the church?
• What brought you to the church and what’s been your impression since attending?
• Finish this sentence. “The characteristic that you admire/love about God is…..”

Look Up

During the first week of this series Tim mentioned we live in a sex saturated society! Where everyone has an opinion about sex. Opinions like…..

Parents say: “Don’t do it!”
The Church “Don’t do it because it is dirty and sinful!”
The Schools say, “This is how you should do it!”
The Media says: “Do it all the time with anyone!”

• What did you hear growing up about the topic?

Tim mentioned that Sex is everywhere.

“God wants you to be holy so you should keep clear of all sexual sin. Then each of you will control your body and live in holiness and honor not in lustful passion as the pagans do in their ignorance of God and His ways. God has called us to be holy not to live impure lives.” 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5, 7

Tim mentioned that holiness is the process where God brings order into your life.

• What do you believe is Gods heart for your life?

Tim mentioned that what most people want for your life is no different from what God really wants for your life. What we really want is intimacy.

• Do agree or disagree…why or why not?

Look Out

• What do you want God to do in your life right now?
• Do you have accountability in your life? If not why not? If yes, how do they hold you accountable?
• What step can you take this week to move you towards Gods plan for your life?